Obviously, this is not a COMPETE background; D & I were a family from day one. But here's a bit about how our children came into our lives.
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Ours is one of those miracle stories...
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D & I got married in May 1993. I still had a year of college, so I was on BCP. I already knew I have PCOS (Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome- I'm SURE there will be future posts on this), so knew things might be tough. I went off BCP when I ran out in April 1994 (graduated May 1st). Nothing happened. In August, my parents were asked to take one last foster child- a 15m. old girl. They asked us to help out- she was supposed to be there about a month. We kept trying. The little girl's birth mom didn't follow through on what she was supposed to do to get her back. A year went by. By now, I'd tried Clomid and was being sent to a fertility specialist. The little girl's birth mom went to ONE counseling session, so was given a 6 month extension before she'd go on trial for child neglect. We went to the fertility specialist (it is now the fall/winter of 1995)- a set of sextuplets had recently been born and made the news. The drug their mother had used was the drug my fertility specialist was suggesting. Our insurance would not cover it & I would need Ultrasounds (US) every 2-3 days for 2 weeks, at the clinic an hour away (taking off work to go). ONE cycle of everything would cost at least $20,000 (AFTER what insurance would cover).
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D & I got married in May 1993. I still had a year of college, so I was on BCP. I already knew I have PCOS (Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome- I'm SURE there will be future posts on this), so knew things might be tough. I went off BCP when I ran out in April 1994 (graduated May 1st). Nothing happened. In August, my parents were asked to take one last foster child- a 15m. old girl. They asked us to help out- she was supposed to be there about a month. We kept trying. The little girl's birth mom didn't follow through on what she was supposed to do to get her back. A year went by. By now, I'd tried Clomid and was being sent to a fertility specialist. The little girl's birth mom went to ONE counseling session, so was given a 6 month extension before she'd go on trial for child neglect. We went to the fertility specialist (it is now the fall/winter of 1995)- a set of sextuplets had recently been born and made the news. The drug their mother had used was the drug my fertility specialist was suggesting. Our insurance would not cover it & I would need Ultrasounds (US) every 2-3 days for 2 weeks, at the clinic an hour away (taking off work to go). ONE cycle of everything would cost at least $20,000 (AFTER what insurance would cover).
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Our dream of having a child by birth was dying... but at the same time it was looking like the little girl's birth mom might be terminating her rights. We realized this just might be God's answer to our prayers, and in February 1996, we were there in court when B's birth mom voluntarily terminated her rights (she would have had to stand trial the next day for neglect) and named D & I as who she would like to adopt B. We laid off the fertility stuff for the time being to concentrate on this precious gift, went through home studies, classes, etc & the adoption was final Dec. 1996 (B was 3 1/2).
I never went back on BCP more than a month or 2 at a time to "regulate" my cycle. I think I started trying Clomid again in 1998? I had found a new ob/gyn by then (still with him). We started with the "typical" dose- 50 mg a day for 5 days. Nothing. I'd have US each month to see if there was any eggs developing. Nope. After a few months, it was upped to 100mg- then 150mg. Then for 7 days, then for 10. Nothing. Then I learned about a medication called metformin (Glucophage) that was being prescribed for women with PCOS to handle Insulin Resistance (and ultimately aid fertility). I started that the summer of 2000. My weight had been creeping up, and combined with moving that fall, about 20 pounds just melted away. (My weight STILL goes back to w/in 2-3 pounds of the weight I settled at). And I just felt BETTER.
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So, we started the fertility stuff over again. Clomid:50 mg/5 days. Nothing. We zipped through the increases faster this time. A few times there was enough "activity" in my ovaries to warrant an HCG shot to release the eggs, but nothing ever fertilized. I grew to HATE home pregnancy tests. Never even a false positive. And then my cycles would be so off I wouldn't get a period afterwards, would have to go BACK on BCP a month to jump start it... see the problems, here? A vicious cycle of disappointments.
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And did I mention the SEVEN nieces & nephews born during all of this (1995-2002)? I had a lot of struggles with this emotionally for a while, but came to an acceptance that God had a plan. We'd talked about adopting again, but never really jumped on it, since then there would be a month where things looked promising... I also had cysts "lasered" off my ovaries at one point, a uterine polyp removed at another & a hypersalinogram (sp??)- "radiator flush" test that often increases fertility afterwards through the years. Nothing. Never. No miscarriages- I almost feel I could have handled that, because then at least I'd know my body COULD get pg and could try the same combo again. I eventually got up to 250 mg of Clomid a day for 10 days- basically 10 times the normal. My Dr. said I had the most resistant ovaries he'd ever seen! He tried to send me BACK to the fertility specialist, but since the guy had tried to told me my PCOS didn't really matter & hadn't seemed very willing to try much else... ummm, no thanks.
I never went back on BCP more than a month or 2 at a time to "regulate" my cycle. I think I started trying Clomid again in 1998? I had found a new ob/gyn by then (still with him). We started with the "typical" dose- 50 mg a day for 5 days. Nothing. I'd have US each month to see if there was any eggs developing. Nope. After a few months, it was upped to 100mg- then 150mg. Then for 7 days, then for 10. Nothing. Then I learned about a medication called metformin (Glucophage) that was being prescribed for women with PCOS to handle Insulin Resistance (and ultimately aid fertility). I started that the summer of 2000. My weight had been creeping up, and combined with moving that fall, about 20 pounds just melted away. (My weight STILL goes back to w/in 2-3 pounds of the weight I settled at). And I just felt BETTER.
---
So, we started the fertility stuff over again. Clomid:50 mg/5 days. Nothing. We zipped through the increases faster this time. A few times there was enough "activity" in my ovaries to warrant an HCG shot to release the eggs, but nothing ever fertilized. I grew to HATE home pregnancy tests. Never even a false positive. And then my cycles would be so off I wouldn't get a period afterwards, would have to go BACK on BCP a month to jump start it... see the problems, here? A vicious cycle of disappointments.
---
And did I mention the SEVEN nieces & nephews born during all of this (1995-2002)? I had a lot of struggles with this emotionally for a while, but came to an acceptance that God had a plan. We'd talked about adopting again, but never really jumped on it, since then there would be a month where things looked promising... I also had cysts "lasered" off my ovaries at one point, a uterine polyp removed at another & a hypersalinogram (sp??)- "radiator flush" test that often increases fertility afterwards through the years. Nothing. Never. No miscarriages- I almost feel I could have handled that, because then at least I'd know my body COULD get pg and could try the same combo again. I eventually got up to 250 mg of Clomid a day for 10 days- basically 10 times the normal. My Dr. said I had the most resistant ovaries he'd ever seen! He tried to send me BACK to the fertility specialist, but since the guy had tried to told me my PCOS didn't really matter & hadn't seemed very willing to try much else... ummm, no thanks.
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I kept researching ideas & would give them to my Dr. I found research that Femara (a breast cancer drug) had been found to aid in ovulation. I gave my Dr. the info I'd found & he researched it some more. He agreed to let me try it along with the Clomid. It didn't help me accept to GREATLY reduce the side effects I'd started having (twinkling lights looked like shooting stars! freaky!) due to my high doses. However, he's told me he HAS had patients that it has helped, and thanked me for tuning him in to it. So, at least SOMEONE was getting results!
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So, B was growing up as an only child. I was doing daycare (2000-2005) and loving on every little baby I could get my hands on. By the beginning of 2005, I was done- no more fertility treatments. 32 years old, daycare was closing at the end of the summer, and I was at peace with having B to finish raising and the thought of an empty nest the fall of 2010. I wasn't sure if I'd be ready to NOT have little kids in my life in SOME way or another at the age of 38, but figured God had a plan. We were thinking of selling the house after I quit daycare & were starting to fix up our old farmhouse. When the daycare closed the end of August 2005, I had rummage sales & sold off almost all of my toys & kid supplies... I kept a few favorite toys & the old highchair my mom had used for all us kids, and darn it, the crib wouldn't sell...
---
I rattled around the house that next year, knowing I'd need to find a job. I had my tonsils out in August of 2006 & lost 15 pounds & it seemed like 10 of it was going to stay off. My mom had knee surgery in October & I filled in for her at the thrift shop as manager. I enjoyed it & figured going back to work might be OK after all... but BOY was I tired at the end of the day (by November) and darn it, those 10 pounds were coming back. And by Thanksgiving, my breasts were SO sore, I made an appt. with my Family-Nurse Practitioner for the beginning of December- thinking I'd need a mammogram & was possibly going into early menopause. My period was still so irregular, I didn't even know when I'd had it last- September? October?? So, off I went to my appt.
---
The FNP did a breast exam. She said she didn't want to send me for a mammogram right then because I would have killed someone with the pain it would have cause (based on my response to HER exam!). She was talking about my triglycerides (they are VERY high) & starting me on meds, etc- when she checked my lab results. They'd done a pg test as a "just in case" since we were talking meds, etc. I was on the table in my paper gown- she was at the computer looking at the lab results & started CRYING!!! "Amy- come here!!!! See that- it's POSITIVE!!!! You're PREGNANT!!" She was hugging me- I was in total shock. She sat me back down & laughed that all the other stuff we'd talked about was just going to have to wait! She did a quick exam & guessed me at about 10 weeks (since I wasn't sure when I'd had my period last). Even the nurse was crying- we'd JUST been talking about PCOS since her daughter had been recently diagnosed- I was offering advice & she had been sad thinking her daughter may have fertility troubles, but relieved to see *I* had come to peace with it... I got dressed, went out to the van & called D. Told him to sit down, I had news for him... (and no, honey, I had NOT been in a car accident...). He was in shock, too.
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I had a meeting to go to at the Girl Scout office- they told me later I was kind of in a daze (ya think??). I went to the grocery store first to buy some lunch- immediately switching to buying fruit & crackers, etc instead of the McD's I'd been planning! I told the check-out girl I'd just found out I was pg. I had to tell SOMEONE, after all- and she didn't know me anyway! I'd also managed to lock my keys in my van- I was in such a tizzy! So I walked to my meeting. At the Girl Scout office, I told one friend there so that they would let me use the phone to call my mom at work at the thrift shop. Mom started shrieking, crying and saying "OHH, Amy! Ohhhh, Amy!!" Yeah- the ladies there guessed pretty fast! The news got back to town before I did (I was an hour away). D came up to bring me the extra keys (gas was cheaper than calling a locksmith- and I think he was anxious to see me!)
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I went to my OB/GYN a few days later to confirm, get an US & find out a due date. He was almost as shocked as I was! He put me at more like 8.5 weeks- estimated due date of July 24th, 2007. We sent the news out in our Christmas letter. Many already knew, since our Pastor had even announced it in church that first Sunday! Yep- BIG support system!! So many people that had prayed for us for years... I stayed on my Metformin & blood pressure pills, ate right, went to all my appts & other than being on the meds, had a pretty easy pregnancy. (Labor was a different story for another day- ended in C-section). C was born 7-25-2007. I was glad the crib didn't sell after all!
---
After C was born, I went on BCP for a year- the meeting at the Girls Scout office was for an Alaskan Cruise I was a Girl Scout Trip Director for & I'd committed to going a few months before I even knew I was pg. Thankfully the dates worked so I could be home for C's 1st birthday (I'd threatened her with an induction at my last appt 7/24 so that would work!) So I was on BCP so I wouldn't be pg on the ship! I'd heard pregnancies can really change each person's PCOS, put differently for different people. So I went OFF birth control in August of 2008. I told people I wasn't holding my breath, though, after waiting almost 14 years for C.
---
I could have held my breath :) My cycles were getting longer & longer each period, but when it got to 52 days on 5/5/09, I tested & got my first ever POSITIVE from a home pregnancy test!! (I didn't hate it anymore!). We went to the Dr. a few days later & got E's first due date of 1/10/10. Later it was bumped up to 1/1/10, and with a planned C-section, she came 12/21/2009.
---
We like to tell people- God has His own sense of timing- and a sense of humor! No, my nest was NOT empty this fall, and while I feel my age, chasing two little ones, I wouldn't have it any other way.
---
So, B was growing up as an only child. I was doing daycare (2000-2005) and loving on every little baby I could get my hands on. By the beginning of 2005, I was done- no more fertility treatments. 32 years old, daycare was closing at the end of the summer, and I was at peace with having B to finish raising and the thought of an empty nest the fall of 2010. I wasn't sure if I'd be ready to NOT have little kids in my life in SOME way or another at the age of 38, but figured God had a plan. We were thinking of selling the house after I quit daycare & were starting to fix up our old farmhouse. When the daycare closed the end of August 2005, I had rummage sales & sold off almost all of my toys & kid supplies... I kept a few favorite toys & the old highchair my mom had used for all us kids, and darn it, the crib wouldn't sell...
---
I rattled around the house that next year, knowing I'd need to find a job. I had my tonsils out in August of 2006 & lost 15 pounds & it seemed like 10 of it was going to stay off. My mom had knee surgery in October & I filled in for her at the thrift shop as manager. I enjoyed it & figured going back to work might be OK after all... but BOY was I tired at the end of the day (by November) and darn it, those 10 pounds were coming back. And by Thanksgiving, my breasts were SO sore, I made an appt. with my Family-Nurse Practitioner for the beginning of December- thinking I'd need a mammogram & was possibly going into early menopause. My period was still so irregular, I didn't even know when I'd had it last- September? October?? So, off I went to my appt.
---
The FNP did a breast exam. She said she didn't want to send me for a mammogram right then because I would have killed someone with the pain it would have cause (based on my response to HER exam!). She was talking about my triglycerides (they are VERY high) & starting me on meds, etc- when she checked my lab results. They'd done a pg test as a "just in case" since we were talking meds, etc. I was on the table in my paper gown- she was at the computer looking at the lab results & started CRYING!!! "Amy- come here!!!! See that- it's POSITIVE!!!! You're PREGNANT!!" She was hugging me- I was in total shock. She sat me back down & laughed that all the other stuff we'd talked about was just going to have to wait! She did a quick exam & guessed me at about 10 weeks (since I wasn't sure when I'd had my period last). Even the nurse was crying- we'd JUST been talking about PCOS since her daughter had been recently diagnosed- I was offering advice & she had been sad thinking her daughter may have fertility troubles, but relieved to see *I* had come to peace with it... I got dressed, went out to the van & called D. Told him to sit down, I had news for him... (and no, honey, I had NOT been in a car accident...). He was in shock, too.
---
I had a meeting to go to at the Girl Scout office- they told me later I was kind of in a daze (ya think??). I went to the grocery store first to buy some lunch- immediately switching to buying fruit & crackers, etc instead of the McD's I'd been planning! I told the check-out girl I'd just found out I was pg. I had to tell SOMEONE, after all- and she didn't know me anyway! I'd also managed to lock my keys in my van- I was in such a tizzy! So I walked to my meeting. At the Girl Scout office, I told one friend there so that they would let me use the phone to call my mom at work at the thrift shop. Mom started shrieking, crying and saying "OHH, Amy! Ohhhh, Amy!!" Yeah- the ladies there guessed pretty fast! The news got back to town before I did (I was an hour away). D came up to bring me the extra keys (gas was cheaper than calling a locksmith- and I think he was anxious to see me!)
---
I went to my OB/GYN a few days later to confirm, get an US & find out a due date. He was almost as shocked as I was! He put me at more like 8.5 weeks- estimated due date of July 24th, 2007. We sent the news out in our Christmas letter. Many already knew, since our Pastor had even announced it in church that first Sunday! Yep- BIG support system!! So many people that had prayed for us for years... I stayed on my Metformin & blood pressure pills, ate right, went to all my appts & other than being on the meds, had a pretty easy pregnancy. (Labor was a different story for another day- ended in C-section). C was born 7-25-2007. I was glad the crib didn't sell after all!
---
After C was born, I went on BCP for a year- the meeting at the Girls Scout office was for an Alaskan Cruise I was a Girl Scout Trip Director for & I'd committed to going a few months before I even knew I was pg. Thankfully the dates worked so I could be home for C's 1st birthday (I'd threatened her with an induction at my last appt 7/24 so that would work!) So I was on BCP so I wouldn't be pg on the ship! I'd heard pregnancies can really change each person's PCOS, put differently for different people. So I went OFF birth control in August of 2008. I told people I wasn't holding my breath, though, after waiting almost 14 years for C.
---
I could have held my breath :) My cycles were getting longer & longer each period, but when it got to 52 days on 5/5/09, I tested & got my first ever POSITIVE from a home pregnancy test!! (I didn't hate it anymore!). We went to the Dr. a few days later & got E's first due date of 1/10/10. Later it was bumped up to 1/1/10, and with a planned C-section, she came 12/21/2009.
---
We like to tell people- God has His own sense of timing- and a sense of humor! No, my nest was NOT empty this fall, and while I feel my age, chasing two little ones, I wouldn't have it any other way.
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